Monday, May 11, 2020

things to do in Bastard Galaxy (part two)


In the Glade

It's raiding season on Inejoi. The harvest is over and it's time for war against Mothercorp. Every year the Glade hires hundreds of off world mercenaries for the Green War. The pay isn't great but it's offset by free supplies and all the plunder you can carry. Make your way through the tall brown grass and try to find a weak point in Mothercorp's defenses. Be wary however, as the local predators also recognize raiding season.

The Glade needs someone to make an emergency delivery. The cargo is a hundred tons of premium farm grade dirt from the depths of the heap and the recipient is a struggling human agri colony. The Glade uses charity to expand their influence network to polities that might otherwise fall under the shadow of Mother Corp. The problem is that the dirt is hot and needs to be smuggled out from under the Mother Corp customs officers. Also it turns out to be more bioactive than you were lead to believe. Something has hatched and is now loose in your ship.

A small detachment of Glade elders needs an honor guard. They are making a pilgrimage to a unity shrine deep within the marsh lands of Feast, where they will merge, body and mind, with the planetary overmind. This is the price the Glade pays for it's alliance with Feast. In addition to the deadly flora of Feast, a Mothercorp assassin is hunting the party, hoping to stop the ritual with carnivorous caterpillars. 


Your gang is being paid to be part of a focus group for a new desert fresh from the Vault. It's white  and creamy and smells delicious but before you can eat it, it eats the test proctor. Now the facility is in lockdown and you need to find a way out before the failsafe worms are released.

Mothercorp has issued a recall on Kinder Garden brand neogenic companions. The're even offering a bounty on them, dead or alive. The issue is that the pets are much more intelligent than advertised and dangerously communalist. A small pack has taken over a local creche and has recruited the children. The pack's leader, Fussy Bottom Little Britches has a counter offer for you. It knows where the local Mothercorp outpost keeps its cash box.

The Scion of a wealthy mega corp has been lost deep in the depths of Forward Garden. This normally wouldn't be a problem; scions come and go while the corp remains. The issue is they had a crucial encryption pad on them at the time. The corp is paying big money to have someone go and fish the pad out of whatever insect nest it's resting in.


State sponsored pre-cogs and clairvoyants have been dropping dead all across the local galactic region. The disturbance has been traced to the storm covered Agredeem colony of Gotlong. The Seeder Initiative has hired you to investigate. Gotlong is home to an ancient tribe of Maskforms that worship the Agredeem Emperor as a God. One of their priests must be behind the phenomenon. The priest hood spend their time in the local dreamscape, which is inside a giant eye. The trick to finding them is shrinking yourself down to the scale of the temples carved out of motes of dust.

The upper class of the Empire demands entertainment. Your team has been scouted as the main event in a death battle/orgy (don't worry, you're a participant, not  a participant). You'll be facing down other teams and assorted monsters in a custom half-submerged stadium reef painstakingly grown in the belly of That Most Elusive and Sacred Glory, the capital ship of the Emperor's Huntmaster, the Great Star Orthano. At the climax of the event the Agredeem nobles will climax, releasing their gametes into the water. You'll probably want to be on dry land for that bit.   

Emphrina is a constant temptation for the Orphan's Guild. An Agredeem Emperor once mysteriously died after visiting the planet and the guild has been tantalized ever since. You have been hired by one of their operatives to go on an oneironautic expedition. The dream world of Emphrina is a massive flooded office block. It's clear that the oppressive tedium of the place is a defensive measure. There is a hidden layer beneath the endless paper work and sodden carpets.   

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